Decorating Around Red Zone

The Lights Came On

Yesterday, in addition to our normal Sunday (get ready for the work week) routine my wife proclaimed we would be decorating outside.  I used to be able to play the old “Wait a minute – Sunday afternoons belong to me and the NFL” card.  Unfortunately she’s learned just enough about football to realize the Patriots were not playing and I was therefore free to assist her outside.

I am grateful that she no longer makes me climb onto roofs and tall trees to place Christmas lights.  The Yuletide season should not be about risking your neck but my wife has never met a Christmas light she didn’t want to see outside her house, even if it endangered the spine of yours truly.

This year she had a whole new scheme worked out.  We resurrected some lights that are placed atop a series of green stakes.  We used to have them along our driveway in earlier houses without the extensive distance we are now blessed (cursed) with.  She wanted them lining the front of the house along with a cloth banner proclaiming peace on earth. 

My job was to make it all work, translating her fantasy into reality.  Many of the stakes and attaching clips on the lights were broken or missing so I got real creative with some wire.  I was just about finished and salivating about sitting down in front of the Red Zone when she saw that there was a whole strand of lights unused.  I was planning on using them for back up in case any of the other lights failed.  She was having none of this.  When I pointed out the green stakes had just about run out she reached into her bag of tricks and pulled out a brand new box of stakes she had purchased on the off chance they might be needed (How do they do that!).  With these additional stakes we (I) were able to extend the line around her rose garden.

Buddy assisted by looking disdainfully at my use of wire.  He did behave himself as he realized he was on double secret probation for some earlier indiscretions with people jogging in front of the house.  This had the added benefit that I was not bothered by squirrels or cats for the entire time I was out there.

 

I finally completed the task and even got the whole thing wired to one switch which properly amazed the wife.  This was a good thing because my lack of Red Zone exposure was beginning to tell.  I turned the lights on as the sun was setting and they all worked.  I have to admit it looks great although I did catch my wife gazing wistfully at the unadorned roof.  I quickly escaped to the Zone before her need to decorate overcame her concern for my continued existence.

Front View with Decorated Door

The Peace Banner and Rose Garden

View From the Driveway - Not Half Bad