Skin of My Nose

Life is all about new experiences - finding them – enjoying them - remembering them. I went two for three yesterday. I missed out on the enjoying part. The doctors and nurses at the dermatology department were their usual awesome selves and made the troubling procedure on my nose as pleasant as possible but that was a very tall order. I was buoyed by the presence of my own personal nurse – my rapidly becoming overly fit elder sister. I think the attending nurses realized they had to be on top of their game with a real nurse in the room with me.

Pre-Op Nose - I hope You Weren't Eating

The doctor came in and asked me to point out where the site of the operation was supposed to be. I kind of thought that was their job as they’re the ones that told me I needed it. I pointed out one of the divots my nose has an abundance of and that was promptly marked for incision. Before we started the doctor (who’s very, very good) found the doctor who made the initial diagnosis and they reconvened above my nose and pinpointed the actual location a little north of where I had guessed.

Following Cut 1

One thing I did learn is that the nose is extraordinarily more sensitive than the ear and neck (where my last Mohs surgery took place). The other downside is having everything right in front of your eyes; some things are better left to an active imagination. The shots to deaden the nose were the most painful part of the entire procedure; well that and the part where they accidently spilled some betadine solution in my eye. The nurse asked me if she had gotten any in my eye and when I opened it felt like someone had lathered in some hot bacon grease. It took two of them to clean it out.

Cut 2

My sister had to adjourn to the waiting room when they were actually working on me and said when she came back it looked like someone had punched me in the eye. The actual cutting for the operation was over very quickly and thankfully they draped my eyes with some clothes so I was spared close up incision view. Most of the morning was spent waiting for the lab results to come back as they test the edges of the excised skin to see if they are cancer free. The hope for only one cut was dashed when they came back needing to expand the cut since they found some cancer along one side. I had visions of my earlier Mohs surgery experience when the cuts went on and on.

The second cut did the trick and this was followed by an extremely long wait to get sutured up. I had pointed out a couple other bumps on my nose and since dermatologists love to excavate they were also taking those off when sewed me up. This is the part where I saw things I really didn’t need to. The cloth slipped so I was treated to an up close and very personal view of a large gash in my nose being manipulated, cauterized (great smell that), trimmed and eventually sewed. It was surreal because there was no pain at all although I unsuccessfully tried to imagine some.

My "Mongoso" Final Bandage

The final act of indignity was the huge (aptly described as “mongoso”) bandage was placed on my nose. I have to keep it on for 24 hours before I can transition to less unsightly proboscis protection. I took my sister out to lunch with this prominent feature and was disappointed I didn’t get to use any of the many lines I had stored up – such as “you should see the other guy!”. In a parting shot the nurse told me I had to go 48 hours without alcohol which is going to put a serious crimp in First Friday celebrations.

After ensuring the patient was okay my sister departed for home with my profound thanks for her company. It turned out I could have done it alone but it was immensely more comforting to have her there. The deadened nerves started waking up in the afternoon so I went out in search of Tylenol and took in another viewing of the Hobbit to kill the pain with distraction. The darkened theater also offered a perfect environment for my facial adornment.

I hadn’t planned on taking anything for the pain, a bad habit left over from military days, but as I said before, if I learned anything yesterday it was - the nose is very sensitive. The coolest thing was the Tylenol actually worked. Ten minutes after I took the pills the pain disappeared completely and hasn’t been back since. I finished off a puzzle of my favorite mountain, Mount Monadnock, which I received as a Christmas gift from the Keene Friend. It was an amateur one where the pieces would fit where they shouldn’t which required a bunch of taking apart and reassembling. The worst part was finishing to find the brand new puzzle was missing three pieces. It will give me something to poke fun at the Keene Friend though – so I’ve got that.

Mount Monadnock Missing Some Slope

The best part of the day was the messages of support and friendship I received from family and friends from around the world. My wife was in full prayer mode down in Panama while some others took a less reverential take on my adventure – see below:

Cantankerous Friend – “Don't worry, you have plenty of nose for them to hack away at”

Son – “Fantastic, you going to look like Frankenstein?!”

Brother in Law – “He should paint it red and wear it at Christmas (upon seeing the final bandage)”

Sister in law – “Dear brother you look like a duck!” (same picture)

My Sister in Law
I Promised a "Flattering" Picture Here After Her Snide Comments