Icy Explosiveness

I was a little stumped about a subject to write about today.  I was going to rail about the unfair nature of yesterday’s weather.  If it’s 28 degrees outside it should be snowing, not raining.  I spent a fun 45 minutes in yesterday’s predawn darkness with my albatross, whoops, I mean my driveway.

I Know I Shouldn't Complain Because We Didn't Lose Power Unlike thousands of Others

It is manifestly unfair being that cold and still get pelted with rain.  Of course the rain agreed and immediately turned to ice upon hitting any surface, including my head.  Despite all of my efforts to prevent it, the ride down the driveway was an adventure taken sideways while hoping there was no other cars coming when I popped out onto the street. 

Like I said, I was going to complain (well I guess I just did) but then Buddy understanding my need for a more provocative subject came to the “rescue”.  My wife, who while constantly bemoaning Buddy’s contributions to household clutter, has a warm spot in her heart for my canine compatriot.  She saved a massive bone from Christmas party for him and presented it to him yesterday.

Buddy was instantly in a blissful state and spent most of the day absolutely destroying his gift.  Unfortunately the bone was apparently a little too rich for his diet because he was in a bit of digestional distress this morning.  I was going through the morning routine of making my breakfast, something he is usually glued to my side for.  Instead he was running back and forth to the door repeatedly asking to go outside.  I initially thought he had spied a slow squirrel or smelled a coyote but it became apparent it was something else. 

I was halfway through my breakfast when I thought I heard him throw up (explosively) in the basement.  That turned out to be wishful thinking.  I was walking down the stairs to investigate and spied a huge mass on the carpet at the bottom of the stairs, confirming (I thought) my initial assessment.  I was actually a little impressed with the sheer size of the mess.  Another two steps brought me close enough to smell the product which had clearly left an orifice other than his mouth.

Buddy This Morning - Trying to Look Apologetic

This was not something I looked forward to after a full plate (well, half a plate) of bacon and eggs.  I really missed having the protective mask I bitched about wearing for so many years in the infantry; it would have helped with the smell.  Buddy looked properly chagrined and emoted some serious telepathic apologies my way.  After stripping the house of most hygienic cleaning products I was able to return the basement to livable condition.  I’m just hoping all odors are not particulate because I can’t seem to shake the smell, even now, a few hours later.  Ahhhh, the joy of dog ownership.

Really Could Have Used One of These This Morning

I went upstairs after my adventures and told my wife who slept through the entire affair what her generous spirit had wrought.  There will be no more pork shoulder bones in Buddy’s future, ever.  I fervently hope your day got off to a better start than mine.  I still love that little scamp though, that’s what a dog does to you.  They give so much you’re willing to forgive these “little” peccadilloes.