My Favorite Panamanian’s biggest concern about my semi-retirement was the impact my daytime presence in the house would have on her established routines. I have a tendency to suggest how certain things work better and I’m guessing she wasn’t looking for constructive criticism in any way, despite her belief in being the sun source of all knowledge (but I digress). She was therefore pleasantly surprised over the first month when that intrusion failed to materialize. I disappear down into the Man Cave and she’s had to come looking for me if she wants to chance interaction.
I will now explain why Wingman has seriously endangered the incipient balance we’ve achieved and become enemy number one in my wife’s eyes. While we were down in New Jersey, Wingman helped me update my new phone and loaded Spotify on it. I know this sounds harmless but the first thing I asked him was how do I find bagpipe music. He readily located an extensive playlist which I was summarily forbidden to play in any of my assembled family’s presence (despite their proven Scottish bloodlines).
I know this all sounds innocuous; now comes my contribution. The other day while down in the Man Cave I started playing the bagpipe music on my phone and an interesting icon popped up. The phone had located my nearby speakers for the television sound system. It asked me if I wanted to connect to and use those speakers. Anyone who has been to my house understands the wall shaking capability this sound system. Very shortly thereafter said walls were indeed quaking as my wife made a quick descent to the Man Cave to rescue the cats she thought I was strangling. She found me with a beatific smile on my face as my beloved bagpipe music inundated my environment. Let’s face it, the only way to listen to bagpipe music is to be engulfed by it. So, since I enjoy a certain amount of spousal immunity Wingman is the villain. Technology can be dangerous.
Today is of course the First Friday of the Week and will be properly recognized with another family Facetime call. I’ll miss Wingman’s pizza and the literal, jumping up and down excitement of the FBR for movie night. At least I have the weekend to look forward to which will include a trip north to my Favorite Son’s home and time with my other two granddaughters. My son says he’s been using my wife and I all week as a bribe with the BRS. She’s been told if she’s good and listens then we will visit, like anything short of axe murders would keep us away. Anyways, back to the pipers!
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RECURRING CHARACTERS
BR3 – granddaughter #3, BRS - Blog Reader the Sequel - second granddaughter; FBR - First Blog Reader - first
granddaughter, ABFA – Amazing Best
Family Athlete = my daughter in law; Wingman
– my son in law; Keene Friends 1 & 2
– friends since high school from my home town of Keene, NH; Soxfather - my brother in law; Great Aunt - my elder sister; Cantankerous Friend – friend since
grade school who likes to argue about everything, poses as radical leftist to
attract women; Pittsburgh College
Roommate – high school friend, also a “Minor Celebrity” in Pittsburgh; Deckzilla – our backyard deck which
grew to monstrous dimensions once my wife got involved in planning; Maine and Virginia Musqueteras – two
close friends of my wife – her US sisters, my wife is the 3rd musquetera
(musketeer); Riggins - also known as
the Grandpuppy, son's dog; PanaGals
– female relatives/friends of my wife from Panama; Panamanian/Latin Mafia – inevitable group of Latino friends my wife
accumulates wherever we have lived & their spouses; Neighborhood Mafioso - wife's close friend and Panamanian mafia
member, Favorite Panamanian - the
wife (of course); First Friday –
celebrations to mark the First Friday of the Week; Curbside Girls – close friends of my daughter acquired during her
single days in Brooklyn
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