Wednesday, November 27, 2019

Hill Growth


Yesterday was supposed to be a lot of fun and it certainly was. It also brought home a serious lesson on aging for me that wasn’t as welcome. I took the day off from work yesterday to hang out with the FBR since my Favorite Panamanian had several errands to run and the Geek Squad was also coming in to install the new television in the Man Cave.  We finally got a beautiful late fall day so the FBR and I headed outside as she’d wanted to get out on Deckzilla since she arrived over a week ago. I put her to work which she loved. She wielded the leaf blower with aplomb and some of the leaves actually ended up off the deck. I think she had more fun just blowing them from side to side.
Picnic at the Bottom
It was at this point I made my big mistake. Since it was such a gorgeous day I said we should have an adventure and walk down the hill to the neighborhood store and buy some snacks. The FBR, in tribute to her burgeoning shopping acumen, was all for this and knew I could not deny her anything once we arrived. We set out and were about halfway down the hill when she told me she was too tired and asked that I let her ride on my shoulders. Again, in no denial mode, she rode the rest of the way to the store. She was an immediate hit at the store, saying hi to everyone and struggling to decide what she wanted from the 12 different selections she’d made in the first thirty seconds. The best part of the trip was at the check-out where the FBR loudly introduced me to the cashier, “This is my grandpa. I love my grandpa.” Misty eyes ensued.
My Little Leaf Blower

A Hard Worker - Just Not a Walker
We stopped by a children’s ball field at the bottom of the hill for a picnic with our recently acquired snacks. I’ve driven by it literally thousands of times but never walked through it. It’s dedicated to four young men who died in a tragic cabin fire in 1968 before any houses were built on the hill where the fire occurred. I’d always wondered where the pesky ghosts came from and had thought them to be Native American (it’s called Indian Hill). After some exploration we were headed back up the hill. The FBR professed to still be too tired to walk and required a shoulder ride. At this point I relearned an old infantry lesson – hills are much tougher to climb then to descend. I swear that damned thing grew dozens of feet in the short time we were at the bottom. This was the kind of thing that wasn’t a problem just a few years ago so I hadn’t given it another thought. I should have. I asked the FBR if I could put her down a couple times but she wasn’t having any of that. She finally allowed me to when I was at the top of the hill at the house literally next door to ours. I was breathing really heavily and felt more confused than anything else because that short hill climb should not have been a problem – getting old kind of sucks at times.
The television installation went well as I was prepared with the seeming library of passwords modern life now requires. The new TV is awesome – spectacularly clear. I can now access Disney+ which the FBR immediately christened with a watching of Inside Out. I’m going to love this because it includes some fascinating National Geographic content as well. That will probably wait for the departure of a certain four year old. I saw the first couple episodes of the Mandalorian from the Star Wars universe and had my geek fully on. So a long climb up the hill on a number of levels but worth it for the time with the FBR and what she said to the cashier. Life and it’s small moments, it’s what it is ALL about.
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RECURRING CHARACTERS                                           
BRS - Blog Reader the Sequel - second granddaughter; FBR - First Blog Reader - first granddaughter, ABFA – Amazing Best Family Athlete = my daughter in law; Wingman – my son in law; Keene Friends 1 & 2 – friends since high school from my home town of Keene, NH; Soxfather - my brother in law; Great Aunt = my elder sister; Cantankerous Friend – friend since grade school who likes to argue about everything, poses as radical leftist to attract women; Pittsburgh College Roommate – high school friend, also a “Minor Celebrity” in Pittsburgh; Deckzilla – our backyard deck which grew to monstrous dimensions once my wife got involved in planning; Maine and Virginia Musqueteras – two close friends of my wife – her US sisters, my wife is the 3rd musquetera (musketeer); Riggins - also known as the Grandpuppy, son's dog, surrogate grandchild while awaiting arrival of the BRS; PanaGals – female relatives/friends of my wife from Panama; Panamanian/Latin Mafia – inevitable group of Latino friends my wife accumulates wherever we have lived & their spouses; Neighborhood Mafioso - wife's close friend and Panamanian mafia member, Favorite Panamanian - the wife (of course); First Friday – celebrations to mark the First Friday of the Week; Deckzilla Dude – senior citizen carpenter/contractor; Voices of Inappropriate Worth - members of public who come to every Worcester public meeting to complain, all are on public assistance along with demeanor issues

Monday, November 25, 2019

Cave Tenting


Okay, so it was a weekend where I got to spend time with both granddaughters so I’m going to wax a little eloquent on just how superb these young ladies are. We journeyed up to New Hampshire to my Favorite Son’s home for a small family get together and the FBR could barely contain her excitement at the opportunity to hang out with the BRS. Once they saw each other there was a barely a moment to pause. The FBR gave the BRS a couple presents that she’d acquired for her during the weeklong shopping tutelage under their shared abuela. We had to hide the presents from the FBR during the week because she felt it was important to test drive them.
FBR and BRS in Full Hugging Mode
ABFA Lap Time While Waiting for BRS to Awaken

Soona  Very Happy Abuela

Moana Watching with my Son

FBR On the Move Constantly

HAppily Showing her the Presents she Bought with Abuela

Lots of Cousin Hugs
They soon evolved a game where the BRS would chase the much faster FBR around the house until the FBR dove into the ball tent. The BRS would follow her in and a long hugging session would ensue. There was the inevitable Moana showing and my son ended up with both young ladies sitting in his lap. It didn’t look like he minded too much. The ABFA’s parents also attended which always makes for a great occasion – it’s family, what can I tell ya? At one point the FBR seized control of my cell phone and decided she was going to take pictures of the assembled family members. She’s only four but did a creditable job - all the photos below are hers.
At First She Didn't Master the Selfie

But She Got Grandpa

The Abuela with the BRS

My Son with one of his Signature Scowls

The ABFA's Parents

And the ABFA
We had planned on continuing our drive north to party Saturday night with the Maine Musquetera but I’ve grown allergic to driving a hundred mile through a promised Sunday ice storm. Just call me a wimp. With the FBR in residence there would not be an issue with filling the day up. After church and grocery store we caught an early showing of Frozen 2. This was a huge event in the FBR’s existence which is testimony to the efforts of the Disney marketing department and the fact it’s a pretty good movie. She also sampled her first ever slurpee which was a big hit. See below for what I thought of the flick.
Very Excited!!

Ready to Rock - Although She spent most of the Movie in my Lap
Finally Sunday also featured a football game between the Patriots and the team I idolized earlier in my life – the Dallas Cowboys. I abandoned them as my second team when they signed Terrell Owens. My Favorite Panamanian understood that I was heading for the Man Cave and expected to watch the game in peace. The FBR was under no such illusion. Despite my wife’s best efforts the FBR decided she was going to watch the game with me. Initially I was a little perturbed but taking a moment to consider I remember telling my kids to cherish these moments because all too soon they’ll be outgrown.
FBR and I in the Man Cave - Note Blanket Fort on the left

So I didn’t sit down for the entire game because I was in charge of the door to the blanket tent we created on the couch. The Pats seemed to do better while I was engaging in the vast FBR gaming world so I went with it. We soon had a trampoline and a balloon floating around which I had to look around to see the screen. I got in trouble a couple times when I cheered for something in the game and the FBR chastised me for waking up baby Elsa who was sleeping in the tent. Elsa seemed to have a lot of health issues and needed to be revived several times by bouncing her on the trampoline. The FBR also appointed herself to control the lighting in the room going from day to pitch black night on a continual basis. I don’t think I’ve ever enjoyed watching a game more; and the Patriots won in a driving rain storm.
Since I’ve got a four year old granddaughter now I can once again fearlessly walk into a  Disney animated movie at the cinema. She was overcome with excitement because I’m told this is a very big deal. All the characters are back form the highly successful first movie and the Disney machine cranks out a faithful and, I have to admit it, highly enjoyable sequel. That was me, my granddaughter was beside herself, proclaiming it the best movie ever, at least for now. The songs are not as memorable as the first movie but I thought the journey the heroes are sent on was more engaging. The voices used are still incredible and Disney animation department – say no more. A great time and the granddaughter enjoyed it too.
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RECURRING CHARACTERS                                           
BRS - Blog Reader the Sequel - second granddaughter; FBR - First Blog Reader - first granddaughter, ABFA – Amazing Best Family Athlete = my daughter in law; Wingman – my son in law; Keene Friends 1 & 2 – friends since high school from my home town of Keene, NH; Soxfather - my brother in law; Great Aunt = my elder sister; Cantankerous Friend – friend since grade school who likes to argue about everything, poses as radical leftist to attract women; Pittsburgh College Roommate – high school friend, also a “Minor Celebrity” in Pittsburgh; Deckzilla – our backyard deck which grew to monstrous dimensions once my wife got involved in planning; Maine and Virginia Musqueteras – two close friends of my wife – her US sisters, my wife is the 3rd musquetera (musketeer); Riggins - also known as the Grandpuppy, son's dog, surrogate grandchild while awaiting arrival of the BRS; PanaGals – female relatives/friends of my wife from Panama; Panamanian/Latin Mafia – inevitable group of Latino friends my wife accumulates wherever we have lived & their spouses; Neighborhood Mafioso - wife's close friend and Panamanian mafia member, Favorite Panamanian - the wife (of course); First Friday – celebrations to mark the First Friday of the Week; Deckzilla Dude – senior citizen carpenter/contractor; Voices of Inappropriate Worth - members of public who come to every Worcester public meeting to complain, all are on public assistance along with demeanor issues

Friday, November 22, 2019

Barbie Horde


As always, having the FBR in residence means the modification of certain grandparent standard operating procedures. No date night this week, not that we’d have the energy for it after a day of FBR operations. This is in no way a complaint because she has been nothing short of an absolute delight. Each day she reminds of more and more of the time we had with her mother at that age. It is completely appropriate therefore that last night we brought her mother’s collection of Barbie dolls up from long term storage in the basement.
A Mounted FBR
The FBR was genuinely excited when she saw the contents. She was even more fascinated when we told her that her mother had played with these as a child. The FBR and her abuela spent a good deal of the evening sorting the cache out. The very inquisitive FBR also tried to read her mother’s teenaged years’ diary which I successfully hid from her.  Earlier in the day the dangerous shopping team of my Favorite Panamanian and the FBR were once again unleashed on a local, unsuspecting mall. The mall even had a playground and a merry go round.
Seeing her Mother's Cache

Sorting with Abuela

Back at it This Morning

Dedication
My daughter surprised the FBR this morning with an early morning FaceTime call which had the FBR running to and then giving the IPad a huge hug. She came down a while later sniffling saying how much she missed her mommy, heart strings severely tugged at. She recovered a few minutes later and was once again deeply immersed in sorting out the veritable horde of Barbies. Her morale grew even more when she learned her abuela was making hojaldras for breakfast.
Stealing Abuela's Glasses at Mall

Mall Playground

She Said she Made Some New Friends There

Working on Secret Christmas Craft Project Last Night
We’re back on the road tomorrow journeying up to New Hampshire to visit my Favorite Son and his crew for what will hopefully be a very revealing get together. We were going to continue up to the Maine Musquetera’s house for a Saturday night barn party but the threat of freezing rain on Sunday negated that. This will free us up on Sunday to go see Frozen 2. I am finding it hard to contain my excitement at that prospect. Well at least there’s First Friday this afternoon.
Lollipop Colored Tongue After Doctor's Appointment Earlier this Week

Hojaldras this Morning!!

Then Back to the Craft Table
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RECURRING CHARACTERS                                           
BRS - Blog Reader the Sequel - second granddaughter; FBR - First Blog Reader - first granddaughter, ABFA – Amazing Best Family Athlete = my daughter in law; Wingman – my son in law; Keene Friends 1 & 2 – friends since high school from my home town of Keene, NH; Soxfather - my brother in law; Great Aunt = my elder sister; Cantankerous Friend – friend since grade school who likes to argue about everything, poses as radical leftist to attract women; Pittsburgh College Roommate – high school friend, also a “Minor Celebrity” in Pittsburgh; Deckzilla – our backyard deck which grew to monstrous dimensions once my wife got involved in planning; Maine and Virginia Musqueteras – two close friends of my wife – her US sisters, my wife is the 3rd musquetera (musketeer); Riggins - also known as the Grandpuppy, son's dog, surrogate grandchild while awaiting arrival of the BRS; PanaGals – female relatives/friends of my wife from Panama; Panamanian/Latin Mafia – inevitable group of Latino friends my wife accumulates wherever we have lived & their spouses; Neighborhood Mafioso - wife's close friend and Panamanian mafia member, Favorite Panamanian - the wife (of course); First Friday – celebrations to mark the First Friday of the Week; Deckzilla Dude – senior citizen carpenter/contractor; Voices of Inappropriate Worth - members of public who come to every Worcester public meeting to complain, all are on public assistance along with demeanor issues

Thursday, November 21, 2019

Alligator Snapping


It seems like I’ve had that proverbial alligator snapping at my butt all week. It’s been a combination of personal and professional issues that arose to challenge but if nothing else the week has sped by until I find myself at weekend eve wondering where the rest of the week went. That isn’t necessarily a good thing because it means a week with the FBR is residence is speeding by, a time I always want to cherish. Of course she’s been part of the equation with her early morning ear infection but still. She’s rallied though and attended additional training with her personal shopping guru – her abuela, hence the new Princess Elsa gown.
FBR Newly Gowned
Most of the issues though have been at work. I hosted both the regional and national vice presidents from my company for two days. I recently revealed my intention to retire in early May 2020 and we met with the customer to map out a transition plan. I then informed my staff and employees of my decision which wasn’t totally unexpected. They’ve seen the winter pictures from the Panamanian condo. It will establish an interesting dynamic over the next few months as I operate as a lame duck which is cool. I haven’t been tested in a while.
Modeling
We’ve also had updates at home. My Favorite Panamanian finally achieved her desired level of lighting in the kitchen. It will now be advisable to wear SPF 50 before entering that room after installation of three lights over the island. On the upside we may be able to fry eggs on the island thus saving gas. When/if she reads this I’m sure a beating about the head and shoulders will ensue. I was on the road last night after work as I returned to Keene Friend’s house to retrieve my new TV. It was an interesting drive after passing through a mini-blizzard just over the border on New Hampshire. It was also remarkable to see how many people were obviously commuting back to Keene. Keene Friend confirmed this was the usual practice. I know Keene is a great place to live and I guess many people choose to live there and commute into Massachusetts to work.
My Drive Home Last Night
Loading the box was even more interesting because it didn’t initially fit. The FBR’s car seat made it more challenging and we were three inches over the back edge of the car. I finally moved my driver’s seat forward a few inches which allowed us to shoehorn it in. It’s a big TV. That made the drive back even more interesting because those few inches made a big difference with my knees now up on either side of the steering wheel. On the upside I may have qualified for some sort of contortionist credit and it made getting out of the car fairly humorous. Luckily it was very dark when I got back so the neighbors were spared.
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RECURRING CHARACTERS                                            
BRS - Blog Reader the Sequel - second granddaughter; FBR - First Blog Reader - first granddaughter, ABFA – Amazing Best Family Athlete = my daughter in law; Wingman – my son in law; Keene Friends 1 & 2 – friends since high school from my home town of Keene, NH; Soxfather - my brother in law; Great Aunt = my elder sister; Cantankerous Friend – friend since grade school who likes to argue about everything, poses as radical leftist to attract women; Pittsburgh College Roommate – high school friend, also a “Minor Celebrity” in Pittsburgh; Deckzilla – our backyard deck which grew to monstrous dimensions once my wife got involved in planning; Maine and Virginia Musqueteras – two close friends of my wife – her US sisters, my wife is the 3rd musquetera (musketeer); Riggins - also known as the Grandpuppy, son's dog, surrogate grandchild while awaiting arrival of the BRS; PanaGals – female relatives/friends of my wife from Panama; Panamanian/Latin Mafia – inevitable group of Latino friends my wife accumulates wherever we have lived & their spouses; Neighborhood Mafioso - wife's close friend and Panamanian mafia member, Favorite Panamanian - the wife (of course); First Friday – celebrations to mark the First Friday of the Week; Deckzilla Dude – senior citizen carpenter/contractor; Voices of Inappropriate Worth - members of public who come to every Worcester public meeting to complain, all are on public assistance along with demeanor issues

Wednesday, November 20, 2019

Like Mother Like Daughter & Retired Military


My Favorite Panamanian and I are enjoying the continued presence of the FBR in our house. She’s with us until Thanksgiving when her parents arrive. She’s been every bit as delightful as usual with an increased vocabulary and some very definite ideas on where grandparental authority should end. We’ve always said the FBR is an absolute doppelganger for our daughter, her mother. The one difference was she didn’t have the serial ear infections her mother did at early age. I guess the cosmos must have been listening to our observations because the FBR acquired one of those infections a couple weeks ago and followed up with one that emerged around 2:30 yesterday morning.
BRS Beating up on a Drum
My wife responded to the baby monitor in which the FBR was requesting her presence. The FBR related that she wasn’t feeling well and that her ear hurt. We had the wealth of experience garnered with parenting her mother through similar late night wakeups. Once the sun rose we contacted her parents who provided the needed insurance information and actually looked up a couple nearby urgent care clinics. Sometimes the internet is fabulous. My wife brought her in and I picked up the requite anti-biotics on my way home. The FBR is a lot like her mother in that she tends to ignore pain and symptoms so she was more interested in coaxing me into a game of hide and seek than taking her medicine. She slept through the night and appears on the mend.
FBR This Morning
It’s so rewarding to see the two granddaughters communicate on our nightly Facetime calls. The BRS was sitting in her high chair and gave us a cursory nod when we appeared. That all changed when the FBR showed up on screen. That took a little convincing because the FBR exhibits a little bit of jealousy when her grandparents focus on the other granddaughter. Once she saw the reaction her presence caused for the BRS however she was all on board. They both seem to thrive with an audience. The BRS acquired the FBR‘s old kitchen set and this morning made a bee line to that before even getting out of her sleep shirt. The FBR sagely commented that the BRS probably wanted to make breakfast for her mom and dad.
BRS Making Breakfast This Morning






A former military bud sent me the article below on political-military relationships. It’s especially relevant given yesterday’s testimony by LTC Vindman before the impeachment committee. I’m often asked about the challenge of military loyalty to a challenging commander in chief. I know I struggled with the situation when Clinton was president. While I thought he was competent I also thought he was beneath contempt morally. That was, of course, before our current president lowered the bar even further. I believe taken that while the president is at the top of the chain of command, the military’s service is to the country and the Constitution which establishes it. I especially liked General Brooks comment that closes the article.
The Slow-Boil Revolt
The Atlantic - November 2019
by Kathy Gilsinan and Leah Feiger
Retired senior military officers are growing more concerned that the Trump administration doesn’t want their advice—and they’re struggling with how much they can say publicly. Here is the unenviable calculation retired senior military officials must make in this politically unprecedented moment: Say nothing as norms shatter around you, and you’re implicitly enabling a president whom some of your former colleagues believe is threatening national security. Speak up, and you risk destroying the balance of power that protects American democracy.  
“For the U.S. military, being apolitical is a critical element of civilian control of the military—an absolute in a democracy,” the retired four-star general Joseph Dunford told us in his first extensive comments since leaving active duty. “The alternative is a military dictatorship.” Dunford, who served as the chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff until this fall, suggests a choice that is uncomplicated. But he did feel compelled to speak out last month, when he publicly defended Alexander Vindman, the White House Ukraine specialist and a witness in the impeachment inquiry, after attacks on Vidman’s character and loyalty in the right-wing media, later echoed by the president himself. He still maintains that he will not directly comment on politics—even as other retired senior military officers have taken the rare step of weighing in on policy matters, including in some cases calling for the president’s impeachment. “I had no intent to enter the political fray or address policy,” Dunford told us in an email. “Alex Vindman was one of my officers and it was an easy decision for me to speak about him after political figures and members of the media questioned his loyalty to the Constitution and our Nation.”
Former Secretary of Defense James Mattis is perhaps the highest-profile example of the silent general, and he has repeatedly declined to weigh in on policy or the president he served. “If you leave an administration, you owe some silence,” he told The Atlantic’s editor in chief Jeffrey Goldberg recently. Mattis has said he won’t criticize a sitting president, but seems comfortable doing so once a president has left office.  In his new book, Mattis freely criticizes both George W. Bush and Barack Obama. Yet his resignation letter to Donald Trump can be read as an implicit criticism of the president, in that he laid out his belief in the importance of alliances and declared that Trump needed a defense secretary whose views better aligned with his own.
Following one of Trump’s most controversial defense-policy decisions yet—the announcement that he would take U.S. troops out of the way of a Turkish assault on America’s Kurdish counter-ISIS partners—we made efforts to contact more than two dozen four-star generals and admirals who retired under Trump to see whether they believed the moment warranted breaking silence.
But Dunford was one of only three we reached who would comment for this story on the record. (Some former senior officers have been willing to criticize the president or his policies anonymously, however.) We found that, for now, the military’s apolitical ethos is stronger than some commentators have argued it should be; and in any case, Trump tends to have more support among veterans than the general public, though nearly half say he doesn’t listen enough to military advice, according to one poll. But there are notable exceptions.
John Kelly, the retired four-star general who served for a time as Trump’s chief of staff, recently made the eye-popping admission that he had warned Trump he would be impeached if someone wasn’t there to check his instincts. Prior to that, Joseph Votel, the recently retired head of the U.S. military’s Central Command, wrote with Elizabeth Dent in this magazine that “the abrupt policy decision to seemingly abandon our Kurdish partners could not come at a worse time.”
Retired four-star generals have come up with a variety of ways to express doubts about the president. Their methods range from the passive-aggressive (like former Chairman of the Joint Chiefs Martin Dempsey’s series of #leadership tweets drawing implicit contrasts with the president’s conduct); to the explicit (like the Osama bin Laden–raid architect William H. McRaven’s op-ed declaring that if the president won’t demonstrate the leadership America needs, “it is time for a new person in the Oval Office … the sooner, the better”, or ex–CIA Director Michael Hayden’s outright call for impeachment) to the kind-of-but-maybe-not-really joking about Trump’s own lack of military service due to bone spurs (Mattis’s remark in October that “I earned my spurs on the battlefield … and Donald Trump earned his in a letter from a doctor”).
The drumbeat of open criticism of the commander in chief from retired senior military leaders is highly unusual. While the overwhelming majority have kept quiet, some retired officers are still calibrating their own sense of what’s most important in this moment. “Honestly, I think there’s a balance point that is not well defined,” Vincent K. Brooks, who retired last year as the head of U.S. forces in Korea, told us of considerations about speaking publicly. “And I don’t think that I know it.” Brooks has previously commented on Trump’s diplomacy with North Korea, saying that the summits with Kim Jong Un didn’t achieve a breakthrough but that the Korean peninsula was safer thanks to the diplomacy. He told us, though, that given the stakes of preserving an apolitical military, the decision to weigh in is personal—and that there’s a difference between offering policy analysis, which he has done, and taking a partisan stand, which he says should be avoided. “I think what you’re seeing is a growing concern that that military advice is not being sought, and if sought, is not being considered,” he said. “I share the concerns as well.”
Paul Zukunft, who served as Coast Guard commandant before his 2018 retirement, has his own concerns. He has tried not to criticize Trump’s policies—but suggested that it can be difficult in this administration to discern what policy actually is. “We’re in uncharted territory quite honestly,” he told us. For example, if a presidential idea comes out as a tweet and not an executive order, is it really a policy? “In that case, that red line becomes very blurred,” he said. Zukunft said at a think tank event in 2017 he stood by the Coast Guard’s transgender troops even after Trump had tweeted they should not serve. Zukunft now says he stands by that comment—when he made it, Trump had only sent a tweet, not set a policy.
The no-politics tradition has had exceptions for decades—probably most dramatically with General Douglas MacArthur’s open defiance of President Harry Truman during the Korean War, but more recently with the so-called revolt of the generals during the Iraq War in 2006, when a number of senior retired officers called for the resignation of then–Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld. Retired generals such as Jack Keane and Barry McCaffrey appear routinely on cable news; others went fully political on either side of the 2016 election, with Michael Flynn leading “Lock her up!” chants at the Republican National Convention and John R. Allen telling the Democratic National Convention that Hillary Clinton would be “exactly, exactly the kind of commander in chief America needs.”
The dilemma for retired senior officers now is whether the oath they took to the Constitution in military life requires deference to the sitting president—as, for example, Mattis has argued—or whether the president himself is such a danger to the Constitution that upholding the oath actually demands discarding the apolitical norm, as McRaven and Hayden have done. Brooks said that commenting on any politician in an ad hominem way represents the crossing of a Rubicon, and that he didn’t know what might force him to do so. But, he said, “silence itself, like being overly aggressive, can undermine the Constitution.”
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RECURRING CHARACTERS                                            
BRS - Blog Reader the Sequel - second granddaughter; FBR - First Blog Reader - first granddaughter, ABFA – Amazing Best Family Athlete = my daughter in law; Wingman – my son in law; Keene Friends 1 & 2 – friends since high school from my home town of Keene, NH; Soxfather - my brother in law; Great Aunt = my elder sister; Cantankerous Friend – friend since grade school who likes to argue about everything, poses as radical leftist to attract women; Pittsburgh College Roommate – high school friend, also a “Minor Celebrity” in Pittsburgh; Deckzilla – our backyard deck which grew to monstrous dimensions once my wife got involved in planning; Maine and Virginia Musqueteras – two close friends of my wife – her US sisters, my wife is the 3rd musquetera (musketeer); Riggins - also known as the Grandpuppy, son's dog, surrogate grandchild while awaiting arrival of the BRS; PanaGals – female relatives/friends of my wife from Panama; Panamanian/Latin Mafia – inevitable group of Latino friends my wife accumulates wherever we have lived & their spouses; Neighborhood Mafioso - wife's close friend and Panamanian mafia member, Favorite Panamanian - the wife (of course); First Friday – celebrations to mark the First Friday of the Week; Deckzilla Dude – senior citizen carpenter/contractor; Voices of Inappropriate Worth - members of public who come to every Worcester public meeting to complain, all are on public assistance along with demeanor issues

Tuesday, November 19, 2019

Crawled and then Some


For the better part of the years of our marriage my Favorite Panamanian has tried, spectacularly unsuccessfully, to have a surprise birthday party for me. That failure was due to her compete lack of subterfuge which I’m guessing is a good thing. She overcame that shortcoming this past Friday. We returned from First Friday and I was instructed to stay in my work clothes instead of my usual slovenly Man Cave uniform of sweat pants and tee shirt.  I was told we were going to receive a visit from a former neighbor who was in the area and she didn’t want to shock their sensibilities with my casual attire. I was then sent to the Man Cave without the usual caustic wifely observations. Thinking back on that now I should have realized something was going on as my escape to the Man Cave is usually met with comment if not outright condemnation. I was safely down there for a couple hours when I had to come upstairs to answer the call of nature. Since I thought it was only my wife and I in the house I initially didn’t bother to close the bathroom door but for some unknown reason changed my mind.
Culminating Group of Excellence at Pour House
That turned out to be a good thing because the majority of the Panamanian Mafia was hidden on the front stair case. I emerged from the bathroom and noticed the front door was standing open and asked my wife if we were heating the outdoors now (Mom flashback). She told me to close it and while I was enroute everyone jumped out. There followed a very fun gathering of friends helping me celebrate the birthday. There was dancing (Panamanians don’tcha know) and Bonecrusher was deployed to appropriately sever the birthday cake. We were still going strong around 1030pm when my daughter and the FBR arrived from New Jersey.
Mafia on the Stairs

Surprise Party

Requisite Dancing


Bonecrusher Deployed

And Was up to the Task
They were joining us for the birthday weekend and the hometown pub crawl. I put on my cat herding hat Saturday morning to get three ladies with differing percentages of Latina blood into the car in time to make the drive up to Keene for the pub crawl. My daughter helpfully reminded me of my age by putting a certain Beatles song on the radio, something about when I’m 64. We extracted Keene Friend from his abode and made our way to 5 Guys for the traditional pre-crawl lunch. We found the Cantankerous Friend wandering the streets of Keene on our way and abducted him. The FBR fell asleep shortly before arriving in Keene and her mother was reticent to awaken her ahead of time. This was a good call because when she did wake up she was in a foul mood, reminiscent of her mother’s M.O. back in the day.
Getting Started at Penuche's

2d Stop Cobblestone
My Favorite Panamanian had volunteered to squire the FBR around various Keene shopping establishments while the rest of us crawled. We arrived at the first stop, Penuche’s, to find the high school classmates already gathering. We were joined shortly thereafter by my son who made the trek over from the East Coast. It was more than cool that both of kids made the effort to be with me and didn’t mind hanging out with a bunch of grey haired peers of their dad. This was the sixth year in a row that I’ve made a birthday pub crawl and it has evolved over the years into a mini-high school class reunion. This speaks volumes about the quality of the people that I graduated high school with.
Lab 'n Lager

Kilkenny's
The crowd grew throughout the afternoon as we made our way from bar to bar. The next stop was Cobblestone Ale House. I schedule this thing for the early afternoon figuring the college kids in town are just waking up and we’ll have the lower Main Street bars to ourselves. This latest class of Keene State College may be trouble though because there was a half-bar full of them at Cobblestone. I think they thought we were a quaint bunch to be conducting a crawl at our advanced age. I know, even in our dotage, we appreciated the accumulated yoga pants present.
Leaving Margarita's
Next it was across the street to the Lab ‘N Lager where even more people joined us including Great Aunt and Soxfather. We were able to occupy our usual front window bench seats and welcomed the late arrivals with the usual counseling on lateness, fortified by two bars worth of crawl. We continued up Main Street to dodge into the back lot for the Kilkenny Pub which is one of my true favorites for the crawl because it’s a real bar and doesn’t apologize for it. We missed it last year because it was overcrowded but it was perfect on Saturday. Even more classmates wandered in and the crawl was truly gathering steam.
We regretfully parted ways with Kilkenny to wander back across Main Street to Margarita’s. We (I) took a brief moment to commemorate the demise of Scores, the scene of so many crawl memories from prior years, when we walked past Railroad Square. A prescient classmate had arranged reserved tables for us in Margarita’s but it took the wait staff a long while to decide to serve us. It seems their five minute break was more important to them than a bigger tip.
FBR Atop this Fabulous Gathering

These Two - Best Birthday Present 
The sun had set by the time we emerged from Margarita’s for the stroll up to Central Square and our final destination – the Pour House. We actually reached our largest number of people at our final destination which was unusual but wholly welcome – especially by the very hospitable Pour House staff. My classmates had kidded me all day about my wife’s shopping expedition and repeatedly asked me if she knew that Keene had a newly opened Home Goods store. I swore them to silence but I took a call shortly after that from my wife reporting that she had located the new store and asked me why I hadn’t informed her of same. That brought a huge laugh from the assembled crowd.
FBR Out with Abuela During the Crawl
We had a fantastic time at Pour House and my wife eventually tore herself away from the new store and joined us there with the FBR. The FBR made a bee line for Soxfather upon arrival as he continued his role as a pied piper for toddler aged children. He hates to dance but the FBR had him executing disco steps in the back of Pour House before the evening was over. The coolest thing about the crawl is the time spent with all the different groups of friends and the conversations range from pole to pole. Each year I’m reminded about the special people I was lucky enough to go through high school with. I haven’t heard of another group approaching senior citizenship who still endeavors to hold the line against age so energetically. I love them.
Shopping
I was reminded we had a toddler with us and reluctantly left the group to wander back down Main Street with the family for dinner back at Margarita’s. I’m sure the rest of the gang kept up the celebrating at Pour House long into the evening. We ended up back at Keene Friend’s house where the group surprised me with a combination birthday/retirement gift (originally planned on retiring around this time). I am now the proud owner of a huge, super smart television to set up in the Man Cave. I was speechless, which after a pub crawl, is definitely not normal. My family, what can I say, they’re beyond any measure of excellence I could use to describe them.
Post Crawl Dinner

Morning After with Soxfather and Great Aunt
We set up my daughter and the FBR in a downtown hotel while the Rhode Island bunch was in another nearby. Breakfast came remarkably early considering the paces the crawlers had been through but we rallied and were joined by the daughter and FBR who walked across form their hotel. Before departing Keene we reunited with Soxfather and Great Aunt in the hotel so the FBR could once again demand every instant of Soxfather’s attention. I’m just now coming to grips with the bone deep level of appreciation I have for all my family and friends as who made this year’s crawl what I hope it is each year. I’m already gearing up for next year’s crawl where I can claim to be a bona fide senior citizen.
BRS Enjoying her New FBR Certified Kitchen
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RECURRING CHARACTERS                                           
BRS - Blog Reader the Sequel - second granddaughter; FBR - First Blog Reader - first granddaughter, ABFA – Amazing Best Family Athlete = my daughter in law; Wingman – my son in law; Keene Friends 1 & 2 – friends since high school from my home town of Keene, NH; Soxfather - my brother in law; Great Aunt = my elder sister; Cantankerous Friend – friend since grade school who likes to argue about everything, poses as radical leftist to attract women; Pittsburgh College Roommate – high school friend, also a “Minor Celebrity” in Pittsburgh; Deckzilla – our backyard deck which grew to monstrous dimensions once my wife got involved in planning; Maine and Virginia Musqueteras – two close friends of my wife – her US sisters, my wife is the 3rd musquetera (musketeer); Riggins - also known as the Grandpuppy, son's dog, surrogate grandchild while awaiting arrival of the BRS; PanaGals – female relatives/friends of my wife from Panama; Panamanian/Latin Mafia – inevitable group of Latino friends my wife accumulates wherever we have lived & their spouses; Neighborhood Mafioso - wife's close friend and Panamanian mafia member, Favorite Panamanian - the wife (of course); First Friday – celebrations to mark the First Friday of the Week; Deckzilla Dude – senior citizen carpenter/contractor; Voices of Inappropriate Worth - members of public who come to every Worcester public meeting to complain, all are on public assistance along with demeanor issues