Canine Granite State Meltdown

It rained yesterday almost the entire day and my wife and I were on the road for a lot of it.  We decided to head up to New Hampshire to visit our friend and take him out to dinner. Since we were spending the night we were also taking Buddy the Wonder Pooch, AKA Pendejo.  Even though it rained, sometimes heavily, throughout the day, my wife and I truly enjoyed the drive.  We first returned to my cousin’s house to retrieve the umbrellas we left there.  My cousin did look a little worse for the wear of the night before.  We wandered up to New Hampshire following some back roads, which even with the rain was enjoyable, great company made all the difference.  We drove by the facility I’m thinking about applying to but the weather was so bad we didn’t get out of the car.  Once we reached my friend’s house my wife snuck out to do some shopping while my friend and I watched the great, “bad cinema” movie Machete.  The rain was almost constant and I was concerned about leaving Buddy in his cage while we went out to dinner.  I thought I had come up with a great way of securing the cage so we headed out for Margarita’s thinking all was secure.  While we sat in the restaurant the weather changed every ten minutes ranging from sunshine to biblical level downpours accompanied by thunder and lightning.  This was not Buddy-friendly weather.  We headed back to my friend’s house and as we walked towards his door I said to him, “If Buddy escaped from that I will be really impressed”.  As we opened the door I was truly impressed as Buddy greeted us completely free of the cage.  Remembering how bad the weather had been and Buddy’s normal reactions my wife charged upstairs to the two bedrooms where she discovered Buddy had not only messed up both the guest room bed and our host’s bed but he had drooled all over both.  I could not have been more embarrassed but Buddy was not through.  He also managed to charge through the screen door of my friend’s front door.  The rest of the night he was almost manic as another friend joined us to watch a movie.  Buddy was a distracting pain in the ass all night.  When I tried putting him back in the cage he wouldn’t even wait until I was out of the room before he started gnawing on the door to escape again.  I was concerned he would injure himself trying to bend the steel bars so I let him out – extremely upset (me not him).  We were trying to have a phone conversation with our son as he was at the airport heading out a romantic Mediterranean getaway with the M.E.G. and Buddy interrupted by knocking over my beer.  As everyone went to bed I stayed up hoping the weather would change and I could convince Buddy to get back into his cage.  No such luck.  I ended up giving up and just blocking everything he shouldn’t sleep on that I could and he slept on the floor at the bottom of the stairs.  I couldn’t fall asleep because I was so upset with Buddy and worried too that he was loose to unleash more carnage if another thunder storm blew through.  I spent the sleepless hours trying to figure out how to lobotomize my psychotic canine partner.  My friend came up with a great line this morning when I said my normal “Buddy the Wonder Pooch!”.  He said, Buddy the pooch that makes you wonder.”