Piper Remunerated in Full

View Out My Hotel Window Yesterday Morning

Lots of pictures today now that I’ve returned to the land of consistent internet. I’ve been performing my penitent duties overnight for the series of comical emails and messages to my snow bound friends over the past week while I luxuriated in tropical Panama surrounded by my wife’s fantastic family and, of course and certainly most importantly,  the wife herself.

I awoke yesterday in the Riande Hotel and put socks on for the first time in over a week as I steeled myself for the flight north. It was hard to imagine I would be shoveling snow later in the day after waking up with this view (see picture).  The hotel provided a free shuttle to the nearby airport which is so much easier than our usual procedure of staying tin the city overnight and then fighting our way through city traffic to the airport.  Kudos to Wingman and daughter for discovering the Riande a year ago.

Best Showerhead Ever

I was still thinking about the going away party from the day before and I can finally share some photos from that bittersweet event. Bitter because it marked my departure but oh so sweet because my last hours near David were spent surrounded by some of the nicest people currently drawing breath. They always make me feel like an important part of the family despite my “gringo-ness”. See pictures from that event below.

Four Generations of Gals from Same Family at Going Away Party

The flight north was uneventful although with each flight I’m becoming more and more a fan of Copa Airlines where they still treat passengers like valued customers – just a great way to fly. We landed in Boston where it was snowing of course and the herd of Panamanian based passengers looked in horror at the snowpacalypse that greeted us. I asked the flight attendant if I could stow away for the return flight. The heavily clad baggage people at the door of the plane were smirking at the looks of terror as the passengers passed through the cold of the doorway for the first time.

Sight that Greeted me at Home

Boston is a great place to go through US Customs; easiest and fastest in the land for my money. They’ve installed a new machine where you answer a couple questions, scan your passport and then the machine rises up to take a picture of you which is included on the receipt which speeds your way through the screening agent. Fifteen minutes after the plane door opened I was sitting in my car heading home.

Photo From Same Spot This Morning

Home may be where the heart allegedly is but mine is definitely a few thousand miles south of here, especially after I was confronted with what I suspected when I pulled up to the house. I waded through a five foot snow drift at the bottom of the driveway from hell, which was once again filled to the brim with drifting snow, to reach the house. I entered to find the house sitters had left the front door unlocked for the last four days but everything else seemed intact – benefits of small town rural life. Then I heard some water running somewhere upstairs. My immediate and biggest fear was some burst pipes and I charged up the stairs in less than athletic form (feet still frozen from walk through snow in loafers).

Side Door of House
Photo I Sent the Wife After She Complained About Heat

The water in the master bathroom sink was going full blast. That faucet had been leaking but during my absence it completely failed and the water flowed full bore. I hope it failed yesterday as opposed to the entire week I was gone, can’t wait for that water bill. I donned all my snivel gear to attempt to open the driveway up so I could move the car off the street. Even though the snow fell three days ago it’s been so cold that it was still in snow form versus ice which would have made the effort a lot more troublesome. I was doing okay until I, or I should say the snow blower, found the Sunday newspaper. I had cancelled delivery for the time I was gone but the paper carrier failed to get the message. The paper became firmly wedged in the impellor and the snow blower quit with the entire driveway still covered. I was rooting around in the darkness trying to free up the impellor when a newspaper headline (appropriate that) flashed in my head – “Charlton Man Loses Hand in Freak Snow Blower Accident”. I wheeled the snow blower back up the hill to the garage, turned it off, and then spent twenty minutes prying the wedged mass out while lying on the frigid snow covered floor (was definitely missing Panama at this point). I finally got it working again and resumed my Sisyphus act on the snow mounds only to hit yet another newspaper (this ended up happening four different times). Many of you are probably now wondering why I could let it happen repeatedly. I did try as I used a snow shovel to screen the snow before blowing but the pesky things were expertly hidden – remember this driveway is haunted. Another hour’s work was required this morning to fully open the damned thing.

It was nearly ten o’clock at night before I finally got the car up to the house and I was completely sweat soaked from the snow blowing and newspaper prying. I guess you could say my penance was more than adequate for all my snide tropical comments of the past week. My plan was Zorba’s pizza for dinner but by the time I finished the driveway – they were closed so I ended up with microwave pizza while regaling my wife with my homecoming adventures. She had the temerity to complain about the heat until I sent her a picture of the snow levels. I miss Panama and her.

The Party Bohio

MY Wife in Carnivale Mask Wearing Appropriate T-Shirt
"Never Underestimate the Power of a Panamanian Woman"
True That

PanaGals Were There

Hammock and an Atlas

The Traditional Way to Cook Sancocho

The Vat of Sancocho

The Brief Requirement for Firefighting Skills

Under the Bohio

Savoring the Heat - Knowing It Had to End

Blessed to Hang With These Folks

My Wife Snapped This as I headed to the David Airport Gate
No More Shorts

Reality Intrusion

I’ve got some great pictures from the going away party my wife’s incredibly fun family threw yesterday but this hotel’s wifi isn’t quite up to the task of that much data transfer. That’s about the only thing wrong with the hotel though – including possibly the best shower ever invented – more on that later.

I spent the entire afternoon scoring the last of a long line of Atlas beers at the party which was thrown in the legendary laugh cousin’s house which sits right on the inter-American Highway a few miles from David. They have a covered outside patio – called a bohio – where the assembled family gathered to send me off in style.

The big meal of the day was a homemade soup called “sancocho” which is only properly made in a huge vat over an open fire; that from the purists in the crowd. Since I’m not a real soup kind of guy they also prepared a slab of prime rib and marveled at why I’d want something like that instead of the supposedly delicious sancocho.

The Hotel

My wife and her sister rescued me from all the fun and faced the very sad task of delivering me to the David airport where a forty minute flight saw me checking into the Hotel Riande Aeropuerto right next to the Panama City airport less than an hour after leaving David.

The only mistake was getting here so late I couldn’t enjoy the pool although I did add a couple more Atlai to the line. The very best thing about the hotel is the shower which was an almost religious experience. I have got to get one of these type shower heads that completely encased me in cascades of water. I think the local water levels were impacted by the time I reluctantly left the huge shower stall.

What I'm Going Back To

Now I have to face the reality of a return north and pay for all the snide tropical comments I’ve made over the past week to my frozen New England friends and family. I may or may not get on the plane to face the driveway from hell tonight. 

Rio Canyon Day

The Canyons - River at the Bottom of the Split in the Rock

On a blistering hot Carnivale Sunday in Panama we were looking for a getaway up into the higher ground above David where some mountain breezes and maybe a swimmable river or two might fall victim to our need to cool off. I’d seen some pictures from one of my wife’s cousins of Los Cangilones de Gualaca (the Canyons of Gualaca) which looked interesting. I asked my wife who in short order mustered a sizable contingent of her family and we were headed on the hour long drive to Gualaca.

Wife Surrounded by Cousins at the Canyons

I’ve always possessed an almost childlike and sometimes embarrassing delight at visiting places I’ve never been before. I’ve been to Panama dozens of times and lived there for three years when I was young but I’d never seen this place before. It’s definitely off the beaten track but well worth the effort as rural Panama has a beauty that’s hard to deny. We passed through the small town of Gualaca and pulled up to the entrance for the Canyons park. The guy collecting the $2 per car entrance fee turned out to be a former student of my wife’s cousin (she of the legendary laugh).

Another View 

The canyons mark a spot where a small river, the Rio Esti, cut a narrow path into the rock which left a ¼ mile stretch of canyon ranging from 20 to 40 feet in depth, depending on the time of year (rainy versus dry season). It was every bit as beautiful as hoped but the entire site was literally teeming with people. My wife said she expected this since it was Carnivale Sunday and almost everybody has today off. Panamanian families lined the sides of the canyons with grills and there was hardly a spot to swim.

My wife pointed out one particularly athletic young Panamanian who was showing off for the various troops of young ladies touring the canyons. He would climb spiderlike up the walls of the canyons, including some sections that went beyond vertical before diving back into the river. A couple times he even leaped across the canyon from one side to the other. Since I missed one of the vertical ascents my wife asked him to show me and of course he fell both times I tried to catch it on camera.

My Wife From Across the Canyon - Spiderman in Red Bathing suit

The Crew

Spiderman Starting his Ascent

We decided to take a short ½ mile hike up the river when a local said there was an additional site to see. It was a nice walk in the Panamanian jungle, especially since I wasn’t weighed down with fifty pounds of military gear and was holding my wife’s hand for most of it. Definitely an improvement over my earliest days in Panama. The upper site was nice and a lot more peaceful; we soaked our feet I the warm river water before heading back to the car.

A massive tour bus had arrived during our walk and was disgorging even more hordes of young Panamanians who set up camp for an overnight church retreat at the lower canyons. This bus driver was really good as he maneuvered his huge beast on the narrow road through the hundreds of cars lining every available spot. We definitely plan of returning next year, on a less crowded weekday and hopefully with both of our "kids" along with WingMan and the ABFA.

Lower End of the Canyons

Wife and Her Sister

Hiking Up River With my Wife

The Upper Site

Getting Some Gringo Feet Wet

We left the canyons planning on stopping at a swimming spot on the Rio Gualaca which passed underneath the road back to David. It was also very busy with the locals firmly established but, as with most Panamanians, they were very welcoming, I was definitely the only gringo around and something of a curiosity. Changing into my bathing suit in a small car in 95 degree heat was probably the low point of the day but that was followed by nearly three hours floating in the cool river water with my wife and her family. River swimming in Panama is one of my favorite activities as is hanging with this group of cousins so it was just about a perfect afternoon. I became my wife’s water taxi as she didn’t want to get her recently coifed hairdo wet so I also managed a pretty good workout as well. We ran into another collection of young Panamanian adventurers who ventured up to the highway bridge and then jumped the fifty feet into the river.

The Group at Rio Gualaca

At one point a small herd of cattle joined us in the river, luckily downstream. One of my wife’s cousins was a poor swimmer which didn’t dissuade her from trying to keep up with the rest of us so I was appointed to keep an eye on her for my wife. She would decide she need to swim to re-join the group, put her head in the water and engage in a furious thrashing before completely running out of energy. The only problem with her technique was she invariably turned 45 degrees from her intended target as soon as she started. Everyone would stop when she set out just to see where she would end up. My wife would then direct me to where the wayward cousin was headed to retrieve her.

The Bathing Beauties - River in the Background

The Legendary Laugh Cousin and I

The sun was setting as a very waterlogged but happy group emerged from the river. We finished up the cooler full of refreshments while drying off and changing. Nobody wanted the day to end so we stopped at Gallardo’s on our way back to David where we absolutely dominated the outside porch while consuming sangria and steaks. One of the PanaGals snuck in her own beverage since she’d failed to finish it off at the river. It resulted in a comical attempt to hide her non-restaurant beverage from the waiter with a serious of obstacles that had the entire table laughing.

At Gallardo's

Eventually and regrettably the night had to end. This was my last night in David as I fly to Panama City tonight and home tomorrow. I wanted to capture as much of the pleasure of hanging out with these special people as possible and store up some energy for the upcoming return home. While I was cavorting in the rio and drinking riverside beers my fellow New Englanders were battling yet another huge storm. A co-worker reported five to six snow foot drifts back in Worcester so I can only imagine what my haunted driveway from hell must look like. But that’s for tomorrow to worry about – I’ve got another day with my wife’s family to warm me up for tomorrow’s challenges.

The Entire Group
I Would Definitely Recommend the Medical Effects of Hanging With this Bunch

Tropical Valentine Bash

Wife and I Yesterday

Yesterday was a very long day which was a very good thing. My wife and her sisters conspired to execute a family reunion/Valentine’s Day party at the youngest sister’s house. My time this year in Panama is limited so this was a fabulous opportunity to see everybody that I might have missed if not for this party.

Pulled Out The Panoramic Feature on the Camera

Nearly seventy five people or there about eventually passed through my sister in law’s back yard as the party percolated from late afternoon until well after midnight. My wife and I showed up around 2pm and I was immediately put in charge of the grill for some unknown reason. I haven’t cooked with charcoal in years and the charcoal in Panama is completely different than what I was trained in early in life. In addition once the charcoal was lit I was expected to keep adding small logs of wood. I eventually figured everything out and had the grill ready when my wife unveiled her planned barbecue meat. I tried to be gentle when I explained that the ten pound hunk of meat would take the better part of twelve hours to cook – I don’t know what she was thinking.

My Personal Purgatory for the Early Part - These Steaks
Consist About 1/4 of the Two Huge Roasts

Wife Surrounded by High School Classmates

I ultimately received permission to cut the roast into a series of steaks which were well received and cooked in less than a turn of the sun. Cutting the steaks and then cooking them over a smoky grill where my talent for having the smoke follow me wherever I turned was not a good way to spend 95 degree heat. I honed this talent in the boy scouts where the wind always found a way to send the smoke in my direction no matter where I moved. I know there are no New Englanders feeling sorry for me with the 95 degree heat remark – yet another blizzard is blowing through the place as I write this. I can only imagine the snow drifts I’ll face Tuesday night.

A Full Complement of the Famous PanaGals

My Motehr in LAw and HEr Sisters

More PanaGals Including the Former Mrs. Cantankerous (center)
and My Beer Dinking PArtner (r)

Host of the Party - Standing

People filtered into the party all afternoon and into the night. A full complement of the fabulous PanaGals was assembled and waxed philosophical about their TJ Maxx depredations of the past few years. The elders took up a lively game of dominoes (a Panamanian obsession) that lasted until the party broke up. I got a chance to hang out with my favorite among my wife’s many cousins – my favorite Panamanian beer drinking buddy who’s blessed with the best (and loudest) laugh in the Western Hemisphere. She was up to the challenge again. My wife led the charge to the dance floor and resembled nothing more than an energizer bunny all night as she charged around insuring everybody was taken care of and enjoying the party. A group of her high school classmates showed up and provided that she hadn’t changed in that respect in the last forty years.

The Domino Game - My Father in Law (r)

Scoring SOme Food With my Wife's Twin Sister

A Valentine’s Day piñata was sacrificed to the celebration although it didn’t go down without a fight. At one point it was beaten into a pulp on the floor and still refused to give up its treasure. My sister in law finally delivered a coup de grace and the candy flowed.

The Twins With the Stubborn Pinata

The Very Active Dance Floor

The music blared all night long and none of the neighbors seem to mind. Its carnivale time in Panama and a certain amount of excess is called for. We had a late night conference with my wife’s nephew who’s also the architect for our hopefully future Panamanian house. Just before midnight I completely ran out of gas and spent some time contemplating the underside of my eyelids in a living room chair while the more stout partiers (Panamanians) continued to churn the celebration in the backyard. I’m more than confident we wrung an amazing amount of fun out of a long, but in reality, all too short a day.

All of My Mother in Law's Brothers and Sisters

The Energizer Bunny Late Last Night