I don’t claim to be any kind of movie
critic, just a movie nut. I present, as evidence, my list of the best and worst
movies of 2024, which could induce gastrointestinal disruption to any serious
movie critic. What can I say, I just love movies that entertain, not so much that
teach or make some kind of obscure ethical lesson. As promised/threatened what
follows is my rundown of the best and worst movies I saw this year. I am an
unashamed movie fanatic. Each year I
pontificate on the best and worst from only the movies I went to see. I’ve also
included what I considered to be the worst movies of the year, because that’s
almost more fun. You won’t find my movies on many critics top ten for the year
because we go to the movies for different reasons. I go to be entertained not
to judge. I’ve also chosen a quote from each of the top ten movies. As you can
see I lean heavily towards action (and science fiction) but I think these films
are a lot more mainstream than the out of touch film critics whose top tens are
usually incomprehensible and barely entertaining. If nothing else the films
below (except for the bottom two) were hugely enjoyable. Again this is only one
man’s opinion and reflects only the movies I saw this year.
Best Movies
#1 – The Beekeeper. A perfect vehicle for Statham as a
semi-retired government fixer/assassin. He goes after a well connected rich boy
running an internet company that specializes in stealing personal info and stealing
from senior citizens, a target rich environment. Complete escapism, but that’s
what made it so much fun.
Quote:
Derek: You're scared.
Wallace: Dead right I'm scared.
Terrified. So should you be.
Derek: Wallace, just tell me what the
fuck this guy is.
Wallace: He's probably the last pair
of eyes that you're going to sneer at.
#2 – The Ministry of
Ungentlemanly Warfare. A surprise for me in that I didn’t
expect to like this so much. A great cast of action actors in a World War 2 scenario.
I was also surprised to find this was based on a real world unit. Of course,
I’ll enjoy anything with Eiza González in it.
Quote:
Marjorie Stewart: It's one thing
taking over the world, but do they have to take over the kitchen too?
It's all sausage, cabbage and black bread.
Heron: We're between a rock and a
hard place. If the Brits win the war, we're stuck with fish and chips. If the
Germans win the war, we're stuck with this menu.
#3 – Deadpool and
Wolverine.
They finally got together!
After getting repeatedly joked about in the prior two movies Deadpool finally
got his Wolverine and it was just too funny as they unsuccessfully try to keep
killing each other. The non-stop cameos were hilarious, a fitting send off to
Deadpool.
Quote:
Deadpool: [after she's captured by
Deadpool using Juggernaut's helmet] You're gonna send us home or I'm gonna
twist your f*cking head off.
Deadpool: [Cassandra laughs] Why are
you laughing?
Cassandra Nova: I can't send you
unless you get this thing off my head. And as soon as you do that, I'm going to
boil your brains on an atomic level whilst flicking my bean to the Enya box
set.
Deadpool: There's an Enya box set?
#4 – Beetlejuice
Beetlejuice. I thought
this was a stretch, but Keaton delivers once again. They took all the original characters
and made you love them again. Ortega was perfect cast as Lydia’s daughter.
Quote:
Beetlejuice: You know, Bob, long
distance relationships can be difficult, especially when one of you is dead and
the other is ignoring you for thirty years. But Lydia and I, we have definite
psychic connection, and I'll tell you something, she definitely saw me that last
time. I felt a little tingle.
#5 – Dune Part 2. A stirring epic by anyone’s definition.
Chalamet soars as Paul in the massive
battle against his father’s killers. Incredible job taking such a complicated plot
and making it so watchable.
Quote:
Jessica: Your father didn't believe
in revenge.
Paul: Yeah well, I do.
#6 – Here. You almost have to be a senior citizen for
the message of this incredible movie to resonate. Looking at various families
moving through a single space over hundreds of years. I know it didn’t fare
well at box office but the impact early life decisions have on every one’s life
was elegantly brought to the screen by two amazing actors.
Quote:
Richard: You know, if you like, you
could spend the rest of the night here.
Margaret: I could spend the rest of
my life here.
#7 – Venom the Last
Dance. The usual fun
when Venom and Eddie are having their internal discussions. Venom’s relatives
come looking for a fight and the final showdown in Area 51 combines, action,
humor, and dare I say, pathos.
Quote:
Venom: Eddie... my home has found us.
#8 – Furiosa: A Mad Max Saga. A great look at the early life of the
most compelling characters from Fury Road. It made you realize where that
haunted look in that movie’s character came from. As usual, the crazed action
scenes from director Miller were worth the price of admission themselves.
Quote:
Praetorian Jack: This place at the
end of your map of secrets. Where is it? {Furiosa pulls away from him] My mother and father
were soldiers. Even as the world fell, they yearned to be warriors for a
virtuous cause. For them, it never happened. I wanna help you find this place,
wherever it may be.
Furiosa: Come with me.
#9 – Young Woman and
the Sea.
I didn’t say I hated all “message”
movies. I watched this with my granddaughter and was so happy she reveled in the
message of female empowerment. Ederle is a heroine for the ages.
Quote:
Young Trudy Ederle: If Meg swims, I
swim!
#10 – Borderlands. I wasn’t encumbered with any knowledge
of the game this was based on so I could just sit back and enjoy a great sci fi
action movie. Any cast with Jamie Lee and Cate in it will be worth a watch.
Quote:
Lilith: I have something you'll
*never* have.
Atlas: What's that ?
Lilith: Enough.
Honorable Mention –
The Fall Guy – Gosling continues his hot streak as a
put upon stunt man in this tribute film to stunt men.
Gladiator 2 – would have rated this in the top ten if
not for the sharks in the coliseum. Other than that overreach, this was a
fitting sequel to the original.
The Worst Movies of
2024
Madame Web – don’t know how they made such a bad movie with such a great
cast, Marvel’s fall continues.
Joker Folie à Deux. What the hell were they thinking! How do
you follow up Joker with this? Tried really hard to watch/understand this,
failed.
2024 Superlatives:
Best Comedy:
Deadpool and Wolverine
Best Horror Movie:
Alien Romulus
Best Drama:
Here
Best Romance:
Deadpool and Wolverine
Best Action:
Beekeeper
Best Special Effects:
Dune Part 2
Best Scene of the Year:
Post credit scene in Deadpool and Wolverine where Johnny Storm tells
Deadpool to say to the villainess exactly what eventually gets Storm killed.
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RECURRING CHARACTERS:
ABFA – Amazing Best Family
Athlete –
my daughter in law; BR3 – Blog Reader #3 – granddaughter #3; BRS - Blog Reader the Sequel - second granddaughter; Cantankerous Friend
– friend since grade school who likes to argue about everything, poses as
radical leftist to attract women; CRC - Connecticut Riverboat Captain – another
close friend from high school, renowned sailor of the big river; Curbside Girls – close friends of my
daughter acquired during her single days in Brooklyn; Czech Connection
– Czech couple who’ve become good friends along with their daughter (the Czech
Shadow); Deckzilla – our
backyard deck which grew to monstrous dimensions once my wife got involved in
planning; Favorite Panamanian - the
wife (of course); FBR - First Blog
Reader - first granddaughter; First
Friday – celebrations to mark the First Friday of the Week; Great Aunt - my elder sister; Keene Friends 1 & 2 – friends since
high school from my home town of Keene, NH; Kindergarten Friend – friend since kindergarten whom I reunited
with after many years; Maine and
Virginia Musqueteras – two close friends of my wife – her US sisters, my
wife is the 3rd Musquetera (musketeer); Namesake Nephew – son of Great Aunt and
Soxfather named after me; Neighborhood
Mafioso - wife's close friend and Panamanian mafia member; PanaGals – female relatives /friends of
my wife from Panama; Panamanian/Latin
Mafia – inevitable group of Latino friends my wife accumulates wherever we
have lived & their spouses; PCR - Pittsburgh College Roommate – high school friend, also a “Minor
Celebrity” in Pittsburgh; PCR+1 - Pittsburgh College Roommate’s wife; Riggins - also known as the Grandpuppy, son's dog; Seis Amigos
- two couples from our condo complex and my wife and I; Soxfather – my brother-in-law (whom I miss more than I can ever
explain); Tia Loca – wife’s younger sister; Wingman – my son in law; Wingmom – Wingman’s mom, of course
