Wednesday, August 15, 2018

Pariah Look and A Big Shark

I’m not sure coming into work yesterday was the most brilliant move I’ve ever made (there’s a long list of such shortcomings). I had this fairly large bandage sprouting out of the side of the face which brought some interesting looks from a lot of my employees. Those who’ve known me longest accused me of having leprosy. The new employees thought their boss had been in a knife fight. I’m going to attempt to embellish that rumor as strongly as possible. My comment to some of them was – “You should see the other guy!”
I’m saying “not brilliant” because I had my usual reaction to anesthesia, even if it’s only local such as was the case yesterday. That reaction meant a brain drilling headache for most of the day. That’s always fun when you have to spend most of that day staring at a computer screen. It was really bad and seemingly immune to the best chemical attacks ibuprofen was capable of. My Favorite Panamanian immediately took steps to alleviate the headache when I arrived, which helped, along with the usual lecture on my idiocy for going into to work in the first place, which didn’t. After her ministrations I dozed off in a living room chair for about fifteen minutes which cured the headache for good.
The FBR was not interested in talking with us last night until she heard I had a “boo boo” and that drew her to the computer screen like a proverbial moth. Her morbid curiosity immediately translated into asking me to remove the bandage so she could see the cut. I demurred and she went back to building a castle out of blocks. The BRS was very happy to hear her abuela’s voice when we called and broke into one of her trademark grins.
Since my head was finally mended we headed out on date night and took in Meg. A movie about a huge shark and Jason Statham. I wasn’t going to miss that, even if it meant listening to my wife gasp appreciatively every time Statham took off his shirt. I’d read the book years ago and always wondered why they hadn’t made a movie about a huge prehistoric shark emerging to devour 21st century humans. The movie took itself a little too seriously at times and had to vanilla-ize to stay below an R rating but it still reveled in the summer monster flick traditions. It was truly unnerving to see a great white shark the size of a freight train cruising around indulging for a penchant for Chinese food. Some of the attacks were startling and even diverted my wife’s attention from Statham’s pecs for a while. This was formulaic but extremely well done as the meg ate his way through the supporting cast. The ending was a bit contrived but did you really think he stood a chance against Statham. A lot of fun.
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RECURRING CHARACTERS
BRS - Blog Reader the Sequel - second granddaughter; FBR - First Blog Reader - first granddaughter, ABFA – Amazing Best Family Athlete = my daughter in law, formerly known both as MEF – Most Excellent Fiancé & MEG – Most Excellent Girlfriend; Wingman – my son in law; Keene Friends 1 & 2 – friends since high school from my home town of Keene, NH; Soxfather - my brother in law; Great Aunt = my elder sister; Cantankerous Friend – friend since grade school who likes to argue about everything, poses as radical leftist to attract women; Pittsburgh College Roommate – high school friend, also a “minor Celebrity” in Pittsburgh; Deckzilla – our backyard deck which grew to monstrous dimensions once my wife got invole din planning; Maine and Virginia Musqueteras – two close friends of my wife – her US sisters, my wife is the 3rdmusquetera (musketeer); Buddy – AKA the Wonder Pooch – family dog, a black lab – hates squirrels, died in 2017; Riggins - also known as the Grandpuppy, son's dog, surrogate grandchild while awaiting arrival of the BRS; PanaGals – female relatives/friends of my wife from Panama; Panamanian/Latin Mafia – inevitable group of Latin friends my wife accumulates wherever we have lived & their spouses; Neighborhood Mafioso - wife's close friend and Panamanian mafia member, Favorite Panamanian - the wife (of course); First Friday – celebrations to mark the First Friday of the Week; Excellent Boss – my former direct boss at work; Voices of Inappropriate Worth - members of public who come to every Worcester public meeting to complain, all are on public assistance along with demeanor issues

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