Sisterly Preview

Wife and Sister on the Beach Yesterday

This past weekend’s visit by my sister in law and her son provided an excellent look far ahead of what life will hopefully be like following my retirement and winters spent down here. While I love this place and already am looking forward to days spent reading and boogie boarding it can be a little too quiet at times. I know it’s dangerous to say that when I’m married to one of the best all time cures to quietness. Her younger sister is no slouch in that department either.

My View, Right Now

What I’m talking about is how much I look forward to hosting friends and family here to share in this remarkable development. I never thought I would own a beachfront condo, much less one on the absolute best beach I’ve ever been to in all my travels. It was so cool having visitors over the past day, especially one such as my sister in law who is blessed with an abundance of personality. So all friends and family should take this as an open invitation over the next few years to escape the cold and dreariness of winter by spending some time with us down here.

At the Restaurant Yesterday

Our Guests

We spent the morning out on the beach while the tribe of pre-teen girls took over the pools. The surf was uniformly awesome again. I noticed I scraped my toes because the boogie board rides were taking me all the way to the top of the beach with enough force that my toes dragged in the sand causing the scrapes. Oh the problems of dealing with tropical living!

Sister Time in Front of Condo

Our guests had to leave after lunch to drive back to Panama City so we hosted them for lunch at my wife’s favorite restaurant down the beach. On our way back my wife dropped me off at the Show Pony Hotel bar to see if they had the Patriots game on. They didn’t but I did get to track what was happening as they had the NFL channel. It’s probably a good thing I didn’t get the game as the only lowlights I saw were the Jaguars repeatedly scoring on them. Hopefully we’ll get some good news today from the lawyer on a needed immigration interview and I can start focusing on my return to Stateside responsibilities.

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RECURRING CHARACTERS

BRS - Blog Reader the Sequel - second granddaughter; FBR - First Blog Reader - first granddaughter, ABFA – Amazing Best Family Athlete = my daughter in law, formerly known both as MEF – Most Excellent Fiancé & MEG – Most Excellent Girlfriend; Wingman – my son in law; Keene Friends 1 & 2 – friends since high school from my home town of Keene, NH; Soxfather - my brother in law; Great Aunt = my elder sister; Cantankerous Friend – friend since grade school who likes to argue about everything, poses as radical leftist to attract women; Pittsburgh College Roommate – high school friend, also a “minor Celebrity” in Pittsburgh; Deckzilla – our backyard deck which grew to monstrous dimensions once my wife got invole din planning; Maine and Virginia Musqueteras – two close friends of my wife – her US sisters, my wife is the 3^rdmusquetera (musketeer); Buddy – AKA the Wonder Pooch – family dog, a black lab – hates squirrels, died in 2017; Riggins - also known as the Grandpuppy, son's dog, surrogate grandchild while awaiting arrival of the BRS; PanaGals – female relatives/friends of my wife from Panama; Panamanian/Latin Mafia – inevitable group of Latin friends my wife accumulates wherever we have lived & their spouses; Neighborhood Mafioso - wife's close friend and Panamanian mafia member, Favorite Panamanian - the wife (of course); First Friday – celebrations to mark the First Friday of the Week; Excellent Boss – my former direct boss at work; Voices of Inappropriate Worth - members of public who come to every Worcester public meeting to complain, all are on public assistance along with demeanor issues

Tropical Solitary

The Visiting Sister and Nephew

I was left to my own devices yesterday as my wife drove back to David for the day to spend time with her younger sister who was visiting from Panama City. They were supposed to come to the beach but the sister didn’t want to expose her new car to the ruts of the approach road to our condo. My wife asked me if I wanted to come with her and I had to balance spending a day at the beach boogie boarding or going to sweltering David and accompany what I’m sure would be some dedicated shopping. The microsecond it took me to make that decision was well spent.

Waves Seen from our Balcony
Sea Eagle on Nearest Palm Tree

I spent the day accomplishing the requisite boogie boarding and since I didn’t have the sun Nazi around I overstayed what my dermatologist would like and got a little bit too much sun, but the waves were so uniformly awesome I was like the proverbial kid in a candy shop. Between sessions on the waves I read under the beachside shelters enjoying the absolute solitude other than the crashing waves. Then a credible tribe of pre-pubescent girls arrived for a birthday party for one of the other residents. There were of that age where every form of communication consists of shouts and squeals. They set up about twenty feet behind me and were soon splashing around the pool between exclamations of delight in each other’s company. Since the arrival of granddaughters I’m a lot more tolerant of these type interactions because I inevitably turn my thoughts to what they’ll be like when they reach that very excitable age. I abandoned the reading for an extended session in the waves hence the sun tan which resulted in a through scolding when the Favorite Panamanian retuned later in the day. I waded out into the waves to try and give you an idea how special the surf is here. This is not to be recommended (the whole wading out with an electronic device and the accompanying lack of agility that comes with elder years).

Wading Out

And Looking Back towards Condo

I fielded a couple of calls from the shopping sisters in which I was able to thoroughly shame my sister in law telling her I was going to start calling her car “Pendejo” since she didn’t want to get it dirty. That apparently had an effect because shortly thereafter I was informed instead of spending the night in David the two sisters and my nephew were enroute to Las Lajas. It turned out my sister in law’s car is equipped with a snorkel so she could have driven through a literal flood to get here. The result was a very enjoyable evening gathered around the kitchen (because that happens in all cultures) and laughing almost non-stop.

Son's Latest Wall

I received a couple FaceTime calls while awaiting their arrival. My son and the BRS reported he finished off one of the smaller walls that are part of his huge front yard wall project. The BRS did not seem that impressed. The FBR was very excited to tell me about her first day in gymnastic class. The FBR and gymnastics are a match made in heaven with her boundless energy and almost scary lack of fear. My daughter and Wingman reported she was an immediate star and even waited her turn when instructed. When the instructor called for volunteers for one of the first exercises the FBR ran to be first. I think this is going to be a lot of fun both for her and the instructor.

Still had Energy After Class

With Mommy

And Freind

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RECURRING CHARACTERS

BRS - Blog Reader the Sequel - second granddaughter; FBR - First Blog Reader - first granddaughter, ABFA – Amazing Best Family Athlete = my daughter in law, formerly known both as MEF – Most Excellent Fiancé & MEG – Most Excellent Girlfriend; Wingman – my son in law; Keene Friends 1 & 2 – friends since high school from my home town of Keene, NH; Soxfather - my brother in law; Great Aunt = my elder sister; Cantankerous Friend – friend since grade school who likes to argue about everything, poses as radical leftist to attract women; Pittsburgh College Roommate – high school friend, also a “minor Celebrity” in Pittsburgh; Deckzilla – our backyard deck which grew to monstrous dimensions once my wife got invole din planning; Maine and Virginia Musqueteras – two close friends of my wife – her US sisters, my wife is the 3^rdmusquetera (musketeer); Buddy – AKA the Wonder Pooch – family dog, a black lab – hates squirrels, died in 2017; Riggins - also known as the Grandpuppy, son's dog, surrogate grandchild while awaiting arrival of the BRS; PanaGals – female relatives/friends of my wife from Panama; Panamanian/Latin Mafia – inevitable group of Latin friends my wife accumulates wherever we have lived & their spouses; Neighborhood Mafioso - wife's close friend and Panamanian mafia member, Favorite Panamanian - the wife (of course); First Friday – celebrations to mark the First Friday of the Week; Excellent Boss – my former direct boss at work; Voices of Inappropriate Worth - members of public who come to every Worcester public meeting to complain, all are on public assistance along with demeanor issues

Paradisiacal Wait

FBR and Mom with New Tattoos

My Favorite Panamanian and I are now in a waiting game for the paperwork we completed earlier this week to make its way down the Isthmus to the capitol city where another legion of bureaucrats await to peruse it. We decided it would be entirely more enjoyable to play that waiting game down here in our beachfront condo in Las Lajas than in the sweltering heat of David with its spotty water and Wi-Fi supplies. We’d been paying attention to the ongoing confrontation with the teachers and government forces which closed the Inter-American highway for three hours earlier in the week (see earlier blog post about that).

BRS Making Friends at Day Care

The road blocks usually crank up early in the afternoon so I wanted to get moving as early as possible. It was for that reason I was making every effort to get my wife moving which all of us who know her will realize is nowhere nearly as easy as it sounds. She had three different appointments she wanted to help her mother with and we had a very short meeting planned with the guy we sold our land to. As she is wont to do while I settled things with the fine young man we sold to she became fast friends with the guy’s mother. It took almost an act of God to pry the two of them and their discussion of grandchildren apart so we could hit the grocery store and then head out.

Beach Lunch/Dinner with Favorite Panamanian

I kept one eye on the other side of the highway to insure traffic was still flowing as we approached the chosen site of the confrontation. I was comforted to see several bus stop shelters full of well-equipped riot police waiting for any attempt at blocking the road. We made almost record time down to the condo – less than an hour. One of the events sacrificed for our telescoped preparation timeline was lunch so after fully stocking the condo fridge we journeyed down the beach to my wife’s favorite restaurant for a very late lunch which coalesced into an early dinner.

FBR With Abuela Inspired Tea Party

Still, nothing can block the peace and contentment of the decompression offered by the time at the beach. This is the first time my wife and I have been alone since late July when her mother showed up. While that was a lot of fun I still treasured some truly alone time with my Favorite Panamanian. We had the entire condo complex to ourselves except for the caretaker who seemed very happy to see someone else around. We settled in for a Mad Men marathon as we’ve reached the final season on Netflix and my wife is truly addicted to the rise and fall of Don Draper who she claims I look a little like (talk about severely rose colored glasses).

Smiling BRS

Walls Going up Back Home

We had a lively talk with the New Jersey contingent where the FBR proudly showed off some facial tattoos she acquired during the day. She very pointedly told her abuela that she was too old for tattoos until Wingman spoke up form off camera demonstrating in no uncertain terms that adults can have tattoos as well. The BRS is now a confirmed crawler which will add some additional, unneeded adventure to my Favorite Son’s life.

Wife Took these Pictures of me Heading Out into Waves Today

And Reading Afterwards

My wife’s craziest sister and additional family members show up today to spend the weekend with us so the solitude will be interrupted in a most welcome fashion. I will spread the gospel of First Friday by escorting them across the road to the Show Pony Hotel bar at the appropriate time this afternoon. I was up this morning and had one of the best sessions ever riding the waves in. I’ve figured out its too dangerous to catch them as they’re breaking but just afterwards gave me a number of 100 yard rides to ankle depth water. After a short swim in the pool afterwards I settled in on the beach for some reading while I dried off. I could get severely used to this lifestyle.

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RECURRING CHARACTERS

BRS - Blog Reader the Sequel - second granddaughter; FBR - First Blog Reader - first granddaughter, ABFA – Amazing Best Family Athlete = my daughter in law, formerly known both as MEF – Most Excellent Fiancé & MEG – Most Excellent Girlfriend; Wingman – my son in law; Keene Friends 1 & 2 – friends since high school from my home town of Keene, NH; Soxfather - my brother in law; Great Aunt = my elder sister; Cantankerous Friend – friend since grade school who likes to argue about everything, poses as radical leftist to attract women; Pittsburgh College Roommate – high school friend, also a “minor Celebrity” in Pittsburgh; Deckzilla – our backyard deck which grew to monstrous dimensions once my wife got invole din planning; Maine and Virginia Musqueteras – two close friends of my wife – her US sisters, my wife is the 3^rdmusquetera (musketeer); Buddy – AKA the Wonder Pooch – family dog, a black lab – hates squirrels, died in 2017; Riggins - also known as the Grandpuppy, son's dog, surrogate grandchild while awaiting arrival of the BRS; PanaGals – female relatives/friends of my wife from Panama; Panamanian/Latin Mafia – inevitable group of Latin friends my wife accumulates wherever we have lived & their spouses; Neighborhood Mafioso - wife's close friend and Panamanian mafia member, Favorite Panamanian - the wife (of course); First Friday – celebrations to mark the First Friday of the Week; Excellent Boss – my former direct boss at work; Voices of Inappropriate Worth - members of public who come to every Worcester public meeting to complain, all are on public assistance along with demeanor issues

Birthday Surprises and Final Check

The Birthday Gathering
Atlas Beer May be Involved in my Facial Expression

The water eventually returned yesterday just in time for the surprise birthday party my wife and her siblings planned for my mother in law. We also had a more serious monsoon rain for the better part of an hour around mid-day. The street in front of the house was literally under water for the better part of an hour and that is notable because as with most streets in Panama it is severely crested to deal with the rain. Thankfully everything fell into place for the party which was the predictable amount of fun whenever my wife’s family gathers.

Her young sister, one blessed with an excessive amount of personality, showed up from Panama City with her son shortly before the party and contributed her usual amount of bedlam and laughter. Since it was a rare fresh day following the rain we staid mostly out on the front porch and car port. We imported a veritable landslide of chicken wings and my wife made a memorable cake. Friends, neighbors, and family continued to show up throughout the evening and it was more fun than I thought possible.

Wife and her Two Sisters

Earlier in the day I was volunteered to help my mother in law with some landscaping work under the very direct supervision of my Favorite Panamanian. As you can imagine with the tropical climate and non-stop rains there was a lot to trim back. I also volunteered to cut down a small tree in the back yard that was blocking the sun from the resident banana tree. It reminded me of my infantry lieutenant days in the Panamanian jungle as I was given a machete to cut the tree down. Maybe it was because I was forty years younger because it seemed a lot easier back in the 1980s. Of course it could be the machete I was given would probably have trouble cutting bread given its dull blade. At any rate I just imagined the faces of the legion of bureaucrats I’ve had to deal with over the past few years down here and brute force and ignorance had the tree down fairly quickly.

The Fallen Tree

Meanwhile, Back Home

The final piece of business prior to the party was finally picking up the check for the sale of our land which has been a two year odyssey. This was the land we were planning on building a second home on before the condo opportunity emerged. We’re very happy with how that worked out but it was another exercise in extreme patience working our way through the sale process. Back home Keene Friend provided the above photos as an update to renovations taking place in our absence.

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RECURRING CHARACTERS

BRS - Blog Reader the Sequel - second granddaughter; FBR - First Blog Reader - first granddaughter, ABFA – Amazing Best Family Athlete = my daughter in law, formerly known both as MEF – Most Excellent Fiancé & MEG – Most Excellent Girlfriend; Wingman – my son in law; Keene Friends 1 & 2 – friends since high school from my home town of Keene, NH; Soxfather - my brother in law; Great Aunt = my elder sister; Cantankerous Friend – friend since grade school who likes to argue about everything, poses as radical leftist to attract women; Pittsburgh College Roommate – high school friend, also a “minor Celebrity” in Pittsburgh; Deckzilla – our backyard deck which grew to monstrous dimensions once my wife got invole din planning; Maine and Virginia Musqueteras – two close friends of my wife – her US sisters, my wife is the 3^rdmusquetera (musketeer); Buddy – AKA the Wonder Pooch – family dog, a black lab – hates squirrels, died in 2017; Riggins - also known as the Grandpuppy, son's dog, surrogate grandchild while awaiting arrival of the BRS; PanaGals – female relatives/friends of my wife from Panama; Panamanian/Latin Mafia – inevitable group of Latin friends my wife accumulates wherever we have lived & their spouses; Neighborhood Mafioso - wife's close friend and Panamanian mafia member, Favorite Panamanian - the wife (of course); First Friday – celebrations to mark the First Friday of the Week; Excellent Boss – my former direct boss at work; Voices of Inappropriate Worth - members of public who come to every Worcester public meeting to complain, all are on public assistance along with demeanor issues

High and Dry in Midst of Monsoon

BRS Inherited her Father's Eating Technique

If there is one thing Panama has no shortage of, it is water, especially this time of year where you can almost set your clock by the afternoon downpour which brings to mind the old expression – “Like a cow pissing on a flat rock”. There seems to be a lot more energetic thunder and lightning than I remember from earlier years but I was sitting in my mother in law’s living room yesterday afternoon as we were in the midst of one such inundation when the maid came in to report the water supply to the house had failed. It was a weird juxtaposition to be literally swimming in water but still being without in the house. It eventually seeped back on sometime overnight but we woke up this morning without water again.

Water Run to Brother in Law's House Today

Yesterday was spent with another episode I can add to my book on adventures with the Panamanian governmental bureaucracy. We showed up at the immigration office with our lawyer/fixer who had stopped by there the day before so they could review the paperwork and was assured we were all set. Our turn came up and the clerk said we needed to get the paz y salvo certified/verified. This was document we finally obtained after a series of adventures on the Panamanian internet last week. We were back here trying to do that with a Wi-Fi that went out just as we were about to send the required information. We packed up all the computers and went to the lawyer’s house where she had a more tractable internet connection but with no additional success getting the needed certification. Thoroughly frustrated after a couple of un-air conditioned hours I suggested we go to the originating office and asked why their system wasn’t working. The Panamanian women looked at me like I was cross-eyed but they didn’t have a better idea so off we went.

FBR Almost Ready to Take the Wheel

BRS Having a Ball

The clerk at that office said that we couldn’t verify our own document and that it had to be done at the office requesting the certification; in other words – back where we started the day. We returned to the immigration office and after the requisite 45 minute wait a clerk called us forward and almost routinely obtained the required certification. Our collective heads almost exploded at this point and it was probably fortunate the incompetent/lazy clerk that sent us down the erroneous path was not present. I told my Favorite Panamanian she could not lash out at her when she returned because we still had to get through this process and bureaucrats always band together. We finally got through everything. I got a new card and we have to wait to see if the next step, yet another interview to confirm my Favorite Panamanian and I are still married, can take place before we have to head home or will require another trip.

Yeah, I Know I'm Cute

And I can Sit Up Now

FBR Imposed Incarceration

The Incarcerator

I had a very entertaining FaceTime call with the FBR last night which helped wash away a lot of the day’s frustration and lack of potable water. We came up with a game where I convinced her if she closed her eyes she would send me jail. While her eyes were closed I put the IPad on the other side of the security bars nearly all Panamanian houses have and when she re-opened her eyes it looked like I was behind bars. She quickly picked up on this and after four or five iterations I had to convince her I had finally escaped and closing her eyes wouldn’t incarcerate me any further, because there is no game she enjoys that she does not want do at least fifty times. My son also sent the accompanying pictures and video where the BRS seems to be embracing solid foods with the same level of etiquette as her father at the same age, is also sitting up, and in the video crawling for the first time.

Birthday Boy

Finally today is the birthday of a man who has been one of the closest things I’ve had to a brother for more years than I can truly credit. Keene Friend came to work for me this past year and is making me look like a hero for his quiet competence and thorough professionalism. I’m a little bummed to be so far away on his birthday and not just because I’m sure he has running water. Pay no attention to the traitorous shirt he’s wearing, he did that to placate the Pittsburgh College Roommate during a visit there. Keene Friend is one of the finest persons I’ve met in this ever longer voyage through life and I count myself incredibly fortunate to call him my friend.

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RECURRING CHARACTERS

BRS - Blog Reader the Sequel - second granddaughter; FBR - First Blog Reader - first granddaughter, ABFA – Amazing Best Family Athlete = my daughter in law, formerly known both as MEF – Most Excellent Fiancé & MEG – Most Excellent Girlfriend; Wingman – my son in law; Keene Friends 1 & 2 – friends since high school from my home town of Keene, NH; Soxfather - my brother in law; Great Aunt = my elder sister; Cantankerous Friend – friend since grade school who likes to argue about everything, poses as radical leftist to attract women; Pittsburgh College Roommate – high school friend, also a “minor Celebrity” in Pittsburgh; Deckzilla – our backyard deck which grew to monstrous dimensions once my wife got invole din planning; Maine and Virginia Musqueteras – two close friends of my wife – her US sisters, my wife is the 3^rdmusquetera (musketeer); Buddy – AKA the Wonder Pooch – family dog, a black lab – hates squirrels, died in 2017; Riggins - also known as the Grandpuppy, son's dog, surrogate grandchild while awaiting arrival of the BRS; PanaGals – female relatives/friends of my wife from Panama; Panamanian/Latin Mafia – inevitable group of Latin friends my wife accumulates wherever we have lived & their spouses; Neighborhood Mafioso - wife's close friend and Panamanian mafia member, Favorite Panamanian - the wife (of course); First Friday – celebrations to mark the First Friday of the Week; Excellent Boss – my former direct boss at work; Voices of Inappropriate Worth - members of public who come to every Worcester public meeting to complain, all are on public assistance along with demeanor issues